


Can I Trust you?

by ThisGuyWrites



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Grand Theft Auto Setting, Angst, Awkwardness, FAHC, FAHC Au, FAHC GTA, Fluff, GTA AU, Happy Ending, Kinda, M/M, Mavin, Past Raywood, Past Relationship(s), Raywood, battle buddies, jeremwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-06-30 11:46:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15751035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThisGuyWrites/pseuds/ThisGuyWrites
Summary: Ryan doesn't want to let anyone in due to past events. But sometimes he doesn't have control over that.





	1. Chapter 1

"Shit! Dude, I didn't see you there. You creep around a lot, especially with that mask on. Scared the shit outta me." I stood in the doorway of Jeremy's room, half expecting him to not even be here. I was hoping he wasn't, because I don't even know why I'm doing this. He hasn't been here nearly long enough. But, he's definitley made an impression.

"Sorry." I said simply as I walked inside and started to look around at everything he had. It was all very... him. Everything he had was from some aspect of his personality, and it all fit together perfectly. Whether it be Jeremy or Rimmy Tim, he always seemed to be genuine with it. And I guess that's why I was doing this.

"Don't take this the wrong way, but... did you need something? I thought Geoff said we had a few days off? And you never really... talk. To me."

I went over to the spare seat he had and sat down, looking over at him. He seemed worried, which actually made me feel kinda bad that I was upsetting him. I am the quietest around him, but that was only ever because he was new.

"...you okay there? Wait, Geoff didn't send you to kill me, right? Because I swear if that's what he meant by 'day off' then that's not cool at all." I couldn't help but laugh, causing him to laugh along after a few seconds.

"Nobody's killing anyone. I'm on a murder break."

"You? Please, I don't buy it. You're The Vagabond, The Mad King. Your only murder breaks are when you're asleep, and I'm not entirely convinced you do that."

"I'd never kill you. And besides, we have the day off. Sometimes it's nice to just think, ya know?"

"You alright? I think this is the most conversation I've gotten from you in the four months I've been here. Still don't know your actual name, or ever even seen your face. Still a bit bitter about that, but it's cool, I won't pry. Wait, you aren't... you aren't leaving, right?" 

Leaving. I flashed back to those days, the final days of him still being here. When he told me he had to go, that it wasn't safe anymore. It was in everyone's best interest for him to go. Alone. 

Pushing that thought aside.

"No. I'm not." His eyes lit up.

"That's a relief."

"Is it?" 

"Yeah. Who else is gonna stand ominously in the shadows?"

"I don't... that's not why I'm here."

"Okay. So what's up Vagabond?" Here goes nothing.

"Ryan."

"...what?"

"My name. It's Ryan." I could see the confusion in his eyes quickly turn to shock, and then his face lit up. This was a new reaction.

"Wait, seriously?" He said behind a smile.

"Yeah. I just... I don't know what it is about you. But I trust you."

"Holy shit Va- Ryan. Wow. I like it. I'm glad you trust me enough." He smiled to himself and I felt... something when he said my name. Relief? It just felt natural.

"One more thing." Guess I should do this all at once.

"Uh oh. This isn't one of those 'now that you know, I have to kill you' things is it?"

"I already told you, I'd never kill you." I reached up to my mask and pulled it off, holding it by my side and looking down at Jeremy, whose mouth had dropped open.

"Woah. You're ho- you took your mask off."

"I did." He just sat there, staring at me for a few seconds before I cleared my throat. 

"Oh shit, sorry. I just... have never seen you without the mask. You're... not as scary as I'd hoped."

"What?"

"Yeah man, I thought you'd have like, scars and some face tattoos. Even an eye patch or something. But no, instead I get perfect hair with sparkling blue eyes on a perfect face. Completely ruined my image of you." He... what?

"Uhh.. sorry?"

"No! No, it's a pretty good look on you."

"Oh. Well... thanks." Okay, that's done. I  
should go now that it feels even weirder.

I stood up to leave and almost made it out, but he grabbed my arm.

"Wait, hang on." I turned around and he was now stood in front of me.

"What's up?" He's a lot closer than he was before, and kinda looked like he was trying to hide his panic.

"Uhh... I just- nevermind. Sorry, I didn't mean to grab you." 

"Okay? Everything alright? I didn't freak you out, did I?"

"No! No, not at all. It was just a stupid thought, forget about it. Uhh... I appreciate the trust. Ryan. God, that's gonna take some getting used to." Again, I don't know why but hin saying it just did something to me. It sounded so right and... fuck. I know exactly what's going on.

"I gotta go."


	2. Chapter 2

"No fucking way. Already?" Geoff was sat across from me, book in hand.

"Yup."

"And you showed him your face? All in the same day?"

"Yup."

"Damn. Looks like you've got it bad, huh? What, it's been like three months? Four? Took over six just for you to show Gavin and Michael."

"C'mon, have you met them?"

"...point taken."

"Geoff I just... I can't do this again. I swore I wouldn't. It doesn't turn out right."

"I know what happened, buddy. Trust me, you don't gotta remind me of it. But honestly, that was probably when you were at your best. With someone there, watching your back."

"Are you kidding?"

"No I'm serious. He made you better, believe it or not. Don't get me wrong, you're amazing at what you do. Probably the best on the crew. But you were always more careful when you had someone to look after. Not that he needed it." Shit. Was I really... am I more reckless now? 

"Look Ryan, I'm not going to tell you what to do. You're a grown man, you do what you want. So if you want to, go for it. I'll back you up completely."

"And if I don't?"

"If you don't... I could always send him back to B-Team? Either that or we just get rid of him, but we'd be losing an extremely valuable person. And I'd have to come up with a story to tell the rest of the crew, and-"

"No! No need for any of that. I'd feel like shit if he got demoted. And so would he. And nobody is getting rid of anyone on this crew. So... you're probably right."

"Alright. So what do you plan on doing then? Because it seems to me like this has been a growing seed in your head that you are now starting to water." He laughed afterwards, dropping his book to the ground.

"Shut the hell up Geoff. I'm just gonna... be regular. A normal dude."

"Oh please. You're shit around people you like. And you're the farthest thing from normal."

"Wha- no I'm not."

"Yes you fucking are. You're great at keeping secrets, you're my number one if I ever need someone to do an interrogation. But hiding a crush? I don't think any of us would bet on you. Especially now that you've realized it." 

"Fuck off."

~~~

"Really? Jeremy?" Jack was outside on the balcony, looking out at the city. I decided to come join because some other asshole wasn't helping. 

"Yes, I know."

"I would not have guessed that at all. You're The Vagabond. He's... well he's Jeremy. You're not exactly matching personalities."

"I'm well aware. Caught me off guard, too."

"Well you know what? I think it's sweet. Proves you do still have a softer side. And a thing for short people, apparently."

"I'm aware of his height. That just... adds to it I think." I leaned onto the railing, joining in watching the city lights against the night sky.

"Well, hey. I won't stop you from doing what you want. If it makes you happy, go for it right? And if it's him... then fuck it. Tell him."

"Think so? I mean, what if it doesn't go as well as you're making it sound?"

"Are you talking about... c'mon Ryan. You can't let one experience decide your life."

"In my defense it was an extremely shitty experience."

"I know. You had it the worst, but it did affect all of us, too. But honestly, if he actually reacted how you said he reacted, then I'd say hes interested. Stop thinking so hard into this."

~~~

"Are you fucking serious?" 

"Keep quiet, alright? We don't need all of Los Santos to hear you." I should've known asking Michael for advice would lead to this. Especially with him in the middle of the kitchen, anyone could come in here. 

"Dude, it's pretty fucking funny. I mean, c'mon, Jeremy?"

"You say it like it's a bad thing."

"Have you seen his choice in colors? Any of his cars? His fucking heist outfits? The man's got no sense of style."

"Seems like Gavin's rubbing off on you."

"Who's doing what now?" Of fucking course. Where there's one, the other is never far behind.

"He said you're rubbing me off."

"Well not today, I haven't. Why's it any of your concern?"

"I didn't- nevermind. Nothing. I'm leaving." 

"He has a thing for Jeremy." I froze in my steps and headed back, facing Michael. 

"What the hell, man?"

"What? I either tell him with you here, or later when were done 'rubbing off on each other'. Which would you rather I did?"

"Neither."

"Really? Lil' J? Have you seen his wardrobe? He has got to be colorblind or something, right?"

"That's what I said. I think the orange and purple gets him off."

"It's just god awful. Then again you have had that mask on for a while, probably clouding your vision or something."

"You two are insufferable."

"Alright, alright. Why'd you tell me about this anyway? Seems kinda... not your style to just talk about your crush. C'mon." Michael and Gavin headed out of the kitchen and into the heist room, shutting the door behind us.

"Well you two are.. a thing. More or less."

"Yeah."

"What's your point?"

"Well, you don't worry about each other?"

"Are you kidding? I worry about Gavin working the microwave without supervision."

"Hey! I know how to use a-"

"You almost blew up the penthouse."

"For a video, Michael! Imagine how funny it would've been!"

"We literally had to call in all of our favors for the month from the police and fire department."

"...yeah alright. Fair point."

"Anyway. Look, no shit we worry. So did you, you've been in this same exact situation. So I don't know what you want me to say. You want us to talk you out of it? Because if that's the case, it isn't happening. I'd be lying if I said this wasn't the happiest I've been."

"Aw, Michael." Gavin wrapped his arms around Michael and he was right. They seemed extremely happy, still making this work between them.

"Yeah, yeah. Get off of me, I've got a reputation to uphold."

"So... I should just go for it?"

"If ya want. We ain't gonna tell you how to live your life, but just do that makes ya happy, alright? Last thing we need is another unwarranted death count leading to our door.

"That was only once."

"One time too many."

Alright. He had a point. Several points. So far, everyone has just told me to go for it. Which is not what I was hoping for at all, but fuck it. 

"Alright. Fuck, fine."

"So you gonna talk to him?"

"I'm... I'll try."


	3. Chapter 3

I've been avoiding him... basically since I took off my mask yesterday. Which probably isn't fair to him, but I needed the distance to think. Which is what I've been telling myself.

Everyone thinks I should just go for it. And hell, maybe I should. Just get it over with.

"Ryan! There you are, c'mon. I need a partner." I looked over and he was sat next to Michael and Gavin, all turned towards me. They were playing Mario Party. Figures. 

"Actually... can I talk to you for a second?" I could see the realization come over Michael and Gavin, and it made me feel sick. I shouldn't do this.

"Yeah, go ahead Lil' J. I had something to show Gavin, anyway. We'll be back." They both headed upstairs, sending me a thumbs up along the way. I fucking hate them.

I shouldn't be this nervous, I do worse shit than this all the time. I'm the most feared man in the city, there isn't one person who doesn't know about me.

"Okay Ry, what's up?" He patted the seat next to him and I instantly felt nauseous. Fuck, I hate this. But it's now or never.

I took a seat next to him, trying not to look over at him and his bright expression that he wore constantly.

"Jeremy-"

"Is this about yesterday?" He said, cutting me off.

"What?"

"Look, you told me your name. And took off you mask. I can only imagine what was going on in your head, but that must've taken a lot. And I'm glad that you can trust me. And I know, I was acting weird afterwards. But... I don't know. I was acting off of instinct, and my instinct said to not let you leave."

"You... what?"

"I know, I know. Its stupid. I mean, in this line of work? I'd have to be an idiot to think it'd work out." 

Hold on. Does he not know about Gavin and Michael? Or... he basically called me an idiot for expecting anything. Which, I mean yeah. Looks like he's right.

"I figured you were gonna come talk to me about it eventually. Didn't think it'd be so soon, but... sorry. Uhh... sorry, I totally interrupted you there. Go ahead."

Well, fuck. I already knew this was a dumb idea, but hearing him say it just made it... I don't know. Hurt.

"That's it. I just... yup. Yeah." What the hell am I saying.

"Okay? So, it's not weird or anything with us?"

"Weird? Why would it be weird? Not at all, no we're cool."

"Cool. Awesome, so uh... did you wanna play?"

"Actually, I have to go... talk. To Geoff. Bye."

~~~

"So what you're telling me is, you're an idiot." We were sat in Geoff's office across from each other. Again. 

"How is this even remotely my fault?"

"If he said what you told me he said, then he just told you that he likes you. And you didn't tell him anything back?"

"No he didn't, he said it was a dumb idea to try and get involved with anyone in this line of work."

"Yeah, asshole. Who do you think he was talking about? It would seem that, for some reason, he hasn't figured out Michael and Gavin are a thing. Guessing he's never walked in on them, lucky bitch. And we haven't told him about any of the past stuff with you. So literally he was talking about himself and you."

"I don't... no he wasn't. And either way, if he was, he basically told me no already. So what point are you trying to make here?"

"Jesus, you're annoying. Look, we have maybe a day or two left before we gotta start planning our next move and getting back out there. I don't want anything messed up because for some reason you're scared of a guy who's literally almost half your size. So go... make things right or whatever. Offer to suck his dick if you gotta, I don't know. Just go dort yourself out, alrigh? And tell him about the other two while you're at it. Maybe that'll soften him up to the idea."


	4. Chapter 4

Jeremy's been avoiding me since we spoke yesterday. I'm sure of it, I've barely seen him all day today, and when I have he's always been walking in the opposite direction.

Which I guess I can't blame him for. He thought I was coming to tell him off about when I took my mask off. And I kind of agreed. Which was a dumbass move on my end. 

So how the fuck am I supposed to listen to Geoff and talk to him? 

"Ryan! Lovely, we need to talk." Before he finished his sentence, Gavin was already pulling me along towards his room. Great.

He dragged me in and the door shut behind us. I turned and saw Michael standing there. Of course.

"You do know that I can take both of you on, right?" 

"I think I'd be able to get a few hits in. Gavin... maybe not."

"I can hold my own in a fight!"

"Yeah, but not against Ryan. He'd destroy you."

"I would." He rolled his eyes and flipped us both off.

"Alright, we aren't here to talk about me. We're here to talk about him." I went over to take a seat on his bed, but then I remembered whose bed it was. So instead I just leaned against the wall.

"Me? Why'd I get dragged in here?"

"Because I don't know what going on with you and Jeremy, but it needs to stop."

"There's nothing going on with us! I didn't do anything."

"Uh huh. So what happened after you guys talked?"

"Nothing! We talked and... I didn't even do anything! He just...started to assume things."

"And you went along with those things, because you're a dumbass who doesn't know how to act around someone he likes. Like honestly dude, how the hell do you manage to be the scariest dude in the city and still be a complete moron around one guy who can barely dress himself?"

"Ya know, I don't know what your plan was, but this is a shitty pep talk. How'd you even find out? Geoff tell you?"

"Course not, you know he wouldn't if you didn't want him to. Gavin was listening in."

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Oh come on, you can't expect me not to. You were a nervous wreck, I had to hear it for myself."

I let out a sigh and slid down the wall until I was sat on the floor. Did I fuck up? Yes. Yes I did.

"Dude, just fucking talk to him. Again. What's he gonna do, ignore you forever? He literally can't, unless he decides to... he just won't, alright? He obviously likes you, just fucking ask him to talk again. And this time, maybe don't be a dumbass and let him do all the talking."

~~~

I managed to finally catch Jeremy alone, partially thanks to Michael and Gavin getting everyone else out for the rest of the day. I found sat down in the living room, watching some tv. Alright, now or never. Again.

"Hey, Jeremy." He physically jumped and fell off the couch. Am I really that quiet?

"Holy fuck, Ryan! I thought you left with the others, what the hell? You don't even wear the mask anymore and you still manage to scare the shit out of me. Impressive." He got back up and sat himself back on the couch, turning to face me. Okay, he seemed to be making jokes again. So maybe he doesn't hate me.

"I don't try to. I should probably work on that."

"Yeah, maybe. But uh, what's up? You didn't leave with the rest of them?"

"No I... didn't want to. Figured I'd just stay here."

"Ah. Well they said I had to stay here, so. Something about watching the house, but honestly who's gonna try and rob us, right? But hey, looks like it's just us, hm?"

"Yeah. Alone. Um, I'm sorry, can we talk? Again?" He froze up for a second before going back to normal. 

"Sure, yeah. Of course why not?"


	5. Chapter 5

"So I feel like you've been avoiding me since we talked." His eyes went wide and he looked anywhere else but at me.

"I wasn't... no. Don't be ridiculous, I wasn't avoiding you."

"Anytime you saw me you would walk in the other direction."

"That doesn't mean anything."

"And the others noticed, too. They're worried it's going to affect us when we're back out in the field."

"Are you serious? Is that why it's just us here?"

"Yup."

"Of course it is. Should've known the house doesn't need a sitter. Well, sorry to waste both of our time, but I'm fine." I may be a mess around people I like, but I can still tell when someone's lying.

"Jeremy, you're not. And if we're being honest, neither am I. So just, hear me out alright?"

"Uh, sure. Yeah, no problem."

"Alright. So... I told you name. And showed you my face. A lot quicker than anyone else in the crew."

"Yeah, that's what Gavin told me yesterday. I was pretty flattered, and I thought it was just because I'm like... a likeable guy or something. But now... I feel like there's a different reason?"

"Well... actually no. That's pretty spot on, you are a likable guy. And that's why I did it, for my own selfish reasons that I told myself I wouldn't do anymore."

"Okay... what reasons?"

"But I did it anyway, because apparently I'm an idiot arou- because... you left an impression on me. And I just wanted you to be able to trust me back, how I trust you."

"Seriously? Of course I trust you, mask or not. Ryan or Vagabond. I'd much rather have you watching my back than anybody else on this team. Although, Michael is a very close second. But I can guarantee, the trust has always been there." He smiled at me and I felt calmer for a split second, before realizing the rest of what I had to say. 

"Great. Right, uhh... so I've been talking this over with the others. About how you said you acted on instinct when you grabbed my arm? What exactly did you mean by that?"

"Oh geez, that? I'm sorry, I didn't think you would be so bothered by it. I was just... reading too far into things I guess. And my body started moving on it's own before I could stop it." 

"Reading too far into what?"

"You... taking the mask off. Your name. I don't know, I mean yeah I guess it's stupid in hindsight? It'd be ridiculous to think of something as silly as you having feelings for me. We're grown men in the most feared gang in the city, yet we still have time for crushes? I know, it's dumb." Wait. Hold up, go back. Feelings? Is he... me? 

"But like I said, it was just a dumb fantasy. In this world we live in, we don't have the luxury. It wouldn't work out." Shit. Geoff was right, of course he was. 

And he still has the same ideology about the whole thing. Figures, it's probably for the best. Especially after the last time I tried, maybe this is what's best for me.

"Ryan? You okay, you look upset. I didn't... I'm sorry I should've kept my mouth shut. Just... can we forget I said anything?"

"Yes. No! No, I promise you didn't upset me at all. Well I mean... it's not your fault. It's just something you said. Caught me off guard."

"Are you sure? What did I say?"

Should I tell him? Maybe... he is part of the crew now. So it would be safe, I definitley trust him. But... not yet.

"I was just... nothing, it doesn't matter. But, back on the topic of relationships, do you not know about Michael and Gavin?"

"What about them?"

"They're... kind of a thing. " His eyes went wide and almost immediately he burst into laughter.

"Are you serious? You're joking, you've gotta be."

"Nope. Have been for a while now."

"Dude, there's no way. Seriously? Holy shit. You know, that actually does explain some stuff. They're never really apart."

"Yeah, tell me about it. And don't get me wrong, they're definitley idiots. But not for that."

"You sound like... you sound like you know from experience."

Alright Haywood. You want him, you gotta let him know. He's part of the team now, and definitely trustworthy. 

"So... how much do you know about Ray?"


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The italicized words are part of the flashback. And the bolded ones are being spoken over radio.
> 
> This is my favorite chapter so far, hope you guys like it!

"Ray... Narvaez? Brownman? Yeah, I've heard of him. He was a part of the crew when I was still back on B-team. Why?" He doesn't know. Of course not, he didn't even know about Michael and Gavin.

"Well... me and him... we used to be kind of... a thing." He looked shocked for a second.

"Oh. Oh! My god, no, I didn't mean like, an actual idiot. I just... you know like, it would be a bad idea for _me._ Not for you, I'm sure it went fine."

"No, you're right. It didn't actually work out."

"Oh. Sorry, I didn't mean to... we don't... if you don't want to then we don't have to talk about this."

"No, it's fine. You should know, since we're on the subject. We were together. And happy, for a while. But, it just didn't work out."

~~~

**_"What the hell is going on? Where are they,_ ** **_why_ ** **_can't we see them anymore? Gavin! Find them!"_ **

**_"_ ** **_I'm_ ** **_trying_ ** **_, Geoff! But I'm a bit preoccupied myself, trying to get away from an entire fleet of cop cars! Give me five minutes!"_ **

**_"We don't have five minutes,_ ** **_who_ ** _**knows what could've happened! Find them now!"** _

_I_ _could_ _hear them yelling back and forth at each other. That's_ _what_ _we_ _did best, yell. Cause a scene. A big enough distraction to_ _slip away during._

_"Theres a drop ahead, don't let go!" I yelled as we sped through the mountain on my_ _motorcycle_ _. I felt his arms_ _wrap_ _around my waist, tightening as we dropped over the edge and landed at_ _the_ _bottom_ _, bike almost falling over as we did._

_"_ _Jesus, Ryan! Calm down,_ _will_ _ya?_ _I'd_ _like to live_ _after all this!"_

_"Don't worry, we'll survive! I promise!"_

**_"Jack,_ ** **_tell me_ ** **_you see the from up there!"_ **

**_"Not yet,_ ** **_I_ ** **_lost them when_ ** **_I_ ** **_was trying to get the helicopter off of Michael. We'll find them Geoff, don't worry."_ **

_"They sound really upset. You sure about this?" I asked, heading into a tunnel._

_"Keep going." I felt him turning my comms off._

_Once we were far enough inside,_ _I_ _stopped._

_"Alright Ray. I drove us out here,_ _can_ _you finally tell me what this is all about? Like for starters, why can't Gavin track us right now?" He grabbed his bag and pulled something out if it,_ _hoping_ _off the bike and walking in front of it._

_"This." He held up his DS. What?_

_"That? What do_ _you_ _mean?"_

_"I had Gavin mess with this a couple months back._ _Asked_ _him to mess with this so it sends out a signal, makes it harder to track me. And then_ _I_ _messed with it a bit so that he couldn't track it either."_

_"You know how to do that?" A small smile formed on his lips for only a second._

_"_ _I'm_ _not just the sniper. I can do_ _other_ _things."_

_"How'd you even get him to agree to that? He's usually super busy with Michael, or just lazy as hell."_

_"Told him it was essential. That_ _I_ _needed it in case if an emergency..."_

_"But... this isn't an emergency. Ray, what are_ _we_ _doing here?"_

_"_ We _aren't_ _doing anything. Me... I'm leaving. Alone."_

 _"No." I spoke faster than_ _I_ _could_ _react. He..._ _what_ _is going on?_

_"Yes. C'mon, don't make_ _this any_ _harder, alright?"_

_"What do you mean you're leaving? Like, for a job? Is Geoff sending you somewhere?"_

_"No, he doesn't even know. Nobody does,_ _and it's better that way. T_ _hat's_ _why_ _I_ _made sure they couldn't find us."_

_"Right, of course. So then what the fuck, Ray? If you plan on going alone, why_ _have me drive you_ _out here? You could've just left on your own."_

_"C'mon man, you know_ _I_ _can't just..._ _I_ _can't just leave without saying anything to you. This heist was perfect, it had all the right amounts of destruction for me to slip through. I_ _even made sure me and you got teamed up_ _."_

_"But why, Ray? I just don't get it, you_ _still_ _haven't told me why_ _you need to leave. Just... don't."_

_"I have to, Ry. I'm trying to keep you guys safe."_

_"Keep us safe? From what?"_

_"My old boss. He's resurfaced and made contact with me a few days ago. I have to leave tonight."_

_"And you think we can't take him? Seriously?"_

_"I know for a fact we can't take him. And I'm not taking the risk of putting you in any danger that you don't need to be in."_

_"So... what? You're just gonna give in and go work for him again? That's your big plan?"_

_"No. Not exactly... that's why_ _I_ _needed Gavin to make that for me._ _I'm_ _running, Ry. He told me to leave you guys and go to him. So... I'm going to. Honestly, the_ _less_ _you know, the better._

_"Are you kidding me? No, this isn't how this is going to happen-"_

_"He threatened to kill you Ryan. I... I don't know how he knows, but he threatened you personally if I didn't come back."_

_"So what? I've taken on the entire police force, you think one guy with a grudge is gonna be a problem? You have to know me better than that."_

_"You don't know what he's capable of, Ryan. I do. So... I'm leaving. I'm leaving and I'm gonna find him and I'm gonna place a bullet right in his head."_

_"Are you kidding me? That's all? Let us help you! After everything you've told us about him you think Geoff wouldn't_ _jump_ _at the chance to kill him?"_

_"I can't!_ _" He yelled as d_ _I_ _could hear the desperation in his voice. Shit. Shit, he was serious._

_"And..._ _I_ _can't come with you?_ _Just me?"_

_"No. They can't lose both of us, they_ _wouldn't_ _survive." He forced a smile. Fuck._

_"Dammit Ray_. _So_ _even_ _after killing him.."_

_"Do you trust me?"_

_"What? Of course_ _I_ _do."_

_"Then trust that_ _I_ _know what_ _I'm_ _doing, alright? After I kill him... he has connections. A lot of connections. That means lots of people are gonna start to come after me. But they won't be able to find me. This... might be the_ _last_ _time_ _you_ _see me. Let's not make this last memory into an argument. Please?"_

_"Fine."_

_"So.. what are you gonna tell them?"_

_"I don't know, the truth. It shouldn't matter, it's not like we can find you, anyway. Not like you want us to." Fuck, I can't believe_ _he's_ _actually leaving. And he didn't... he doesn't wanna bring me along. Fuck man._

_"Don't do that Ryan. Stop thinking about it, this isn't your fault. Okay? I have to leave. Now. And you gotta get back before_ _they_ _destroy the city looking for us. Alright?"_

_I looked him in the eyes for the first time since_ _we_ _stopped_ _and he looked... destroyed. Like he didn't know what else to do. A look_ _I've_ _never_ _seen on him before. Fuck man, this is it._

_"Fine, take my bike. Go." I turned_ _around_ _, not wanting to see him leave. I didn't... of all the things that could've went wrong today, I didn't even consider this to be one of them._

_I_ _stiffened_ _as I felt_ _arms_ _wrap around me from behind, fighting_ _back_ _whatever tears_ _I_ _felt coming._

_"I love you Ry. Always."_

_I refuse to turn_ _around_ _, if_ _I_ _do, then_ _I_ _won't let him leave. I just can't. But if_ _I_ _don't watch, then_ _I_ _won't have a say._

_After a few minutes he let go, and_ _I_ _could hear the engine start up on my motorcycle. Fuck._

_"Wait." I turned around and walked over to him, grabbing him and pressing my lips on his for what is now the last time. And I didn't want it to end, and he didn't either as he deepened_ _the_ _kiss._

_Minutes went by for what felt like a_ _lifetime_ _, and_ _we_ _separated. I took a step back and let him get_ _readjusted_ _on the seat._

_"Bye Ryan."_

_"Bye Ray."_


	7. Chapter 7

"Wow Ryan. That's... that's a lot."

"Yeah. And it still... hurts. A bit. But I'm working on it, getting better I think."

"Shit, dude. I'm sorry, I had no idea. I thought he just left to work on his own."

"It's fine, you couldn't have known. It's basically my fault that nobody knew, I made sure nobody in the main crew mentioned why he actually left. To anyone, even to you guys in B-team."

"Well is he... alright? Like, have you heard anything at all from him since then?"

"I don't know. The day he left was the last time I even saw him. About a month after he left, word spread that the man he was looking for had been killed. A single bullet through his head. But after that... nothing. Not a single word from him, I don't know if he's even- no. He's definitely alive, he's never been one to go down easy. But other than that, I never heard from him again."

"Damn. I'm sorry dude, that's gotta be terrible. About what I said before, the whole idiot thing. I... I didn't mean it like that or anything, I was just... speaking out of my ass."

"No, it's fine. You were right, relationships don't end well for us. Probably never will."

"But, Michael and Gavin? What about them, they seem to be okay. How long has that been a thing?"

"Since before me and Ray even started."

"See? So there is hope for us." His eyes went wide as he realized what he said. 

"I didn't- I wasn't trying to say anything like that, I swear. It just came out, sorry. Especially after everything you just told me, that's awful timing on my part. Shit-"

"Relax, you're fine. One of us had to say it, right?"

"So... you agree? And you're not mad? Or upset with me or anything?"

"Far from upset. I'm actually feeling a lot more at peace than I've felt in a long time. I wouldn't have told you all that if I was upset with you. I can trust you Jeremy, so I'm willing to give it a shot if you are." His face lit up and I couldn't help but smile back. 

"Okay. Yeah, totally, that'd be great." He looked at me, and I could see his eyes beading towards my mouth.

"It's okay, I don't bite. Unless you want me to." He laughed and reached a hand out, grabbing me by my collar and pulling my face towards his.

"Shut up and come here."


End file.
